Working mum guilt. That annoying inner gremlin that tells us that we should be spending more time with our kids then going to work or simply doing something for ourselves. Believe me, I’ve experienced it and I’ve constantly judged and criticised myself for not being the mum that society expects me to be – and I still do.
But, look at it this way, if we didn’t work or do something for ourselves and were with our kids 24/7 would we be happy? It’s easy to say ‘yes’ but I remember when Sofia was born and the subsequent months, I didn’t have any help or support and lost myself. I fell in a state of depression because I was
doing everything to make her happy, yet I was unhappy because I didn’t have time for me. To some this might sound selfish but, I was on this big hamster wheel that wasn’t stopping, and I simply burned out.
This is why I decided to go back to work and start Careersafterkids because I needed to be happy in myself -and it’s made Sofia happy. Don’t get me wrong, I feel guilty all the time about leaving Sofia at nursery, but I remind myself why I do it and that she’s happy there. I’m so happy that she’s independent, confident, the best chair climber and a cheeky little monkey. To see her thriving and making friends reassures me that I’ve made the right decision.
If you’re not happy with the time you spend with your kids, think of ways you can grab time with your kids. Read them a story before bedtime, play a game together, more cuddles, play jokes on one another, take them to the park or another activity after school. Remember quality time is far more important than quantity.
So, if you’re still feeling guilty about returning to work or having a bit of “you” time, remember that you are an amazing, confident and inspiring women to your kids who love you every day. You’ve got this and if you and your kids are truly happy in your life why change it? So, tell that guilt to go and do one honey as you’re awesome!
The biggest thing I’ve learnt from having a career and being a mum is the ability to be strong enough to say, “this is the life I want” and not feel guilty for saying it. I know, it’s easier said than done right? But, I’ve been able to do this by organising my career in a way that doesn’t inflict on family life.Discover more